November 2024 Adoption Update
Hey everyone! It’s been a minute since we’ve sent out and adoption update. Lots of life has happened since March: I started my own business, Woodland Studios, and J. performed his first baptisms, a wedding, and lots more church things, as well as some fun trips in between.
Home Study
Every year, J. and I (and our upstairs neighbors) must get our home study renewed. A home study is a review to make sure that we are ‘fit’ to raise a child in our home. We must get medical clearances, background checks, a home safety evaluation, financial review, and more to pass this process. When we got this done the first time, it took the State of Vermont almost six months to get our background checks cleared, so having to do the process again terrified us. On top of that, we got new neighbors, and since they technically have access to our house, they had to start the process from scratch.
Our valid home study expired on September 6, and even though we started the renewal process in July, we knew that we would not make the deadline to get cleared by September because of situations out of our control.
So, September came and went. We had to sign a document saying that we knew our profile could not be shown to prospective families and that if we were on this waitlist for two months, we would potentially have to pay fines and lose our spot on the waiting list (around 85 out of 125 families).
To be honest, J. and I started to panic. We were, once again, at the mercy of the State of Vermont. If history were to repeat itself, we wouldn’t get our clearances back until 2025, let alone by the 60-day deadline of November 6, BUT this is where the story gets good!
Out of desperation, we emailed our state representative, Carl Demrow, asking if he knew anyways to get the state to process our paperwork. Less than five minutes after sending the email explaining our situation, he called J. It turns out our representative is an adoptee, so when he heard our story, he wanted to help in any way possible.
Within the hour, emails were sent to commissioners, state directors, and more! Carl had the ability to shoot our case to the top of the list and follow it to make sure it was moving along. Every step of the way, we were in contact with department heads, making sure everything was complete. For the first time, it seemed like we had someone on our side within state government. (P.S., this is not a formal endorsement for Carl, just showing how thankful we are for his service to us).
So, on November 4, TWO days before our cutoff, all the paperwork was turned in and completed. We are back on the waiting list, now being moved up to number 75!
Waiting List
What does it mean to be on the waiting list? Well, we are cleared to be shown to prospective birth parents again! Here’s a little insight as to how the process goes. When birth parents decide that the best course of action for their child is adoption, they work with a company to find a match for that child. If they choose Nightlight (the company we are working with), then Nightlight asks their preferences for the adoptive parents. Nightlight’s first goal when matching birth parents to adoptive parents is to match the desires of both parties. So, if the birth parents ask that their child grow up in rural Vermont, we will be shown first!
Most of the time the requests are not that specific, so that is where the waiting list comes into play. When there is a child placed for adoption, the ten longest waiting families that fit their situation are shown first to the birth parents. The birth parents can then either select one of the ten to meet and consider or move on to the next ten in line. We are currently 75 out of 125ish. Whenever a child is placed, or a waiting family ahead of us drops out, we move up in the line, but it takes time. We’ve moved about 30-35 spots over the last year.
While unfortunately I cannot tell you when we will be matched with a child, looking at the math, it is likely that we will be waiting more than a year to be matched. Of course, there is always the possibility that birth parents will have a very specific list of requests or that they will reject everyone ahead of us, but the most likely course is that we won’t be shown often until we get around #40.
Conclusion
I hope this gives some clarity as to what we have been doing, where we are on the waiting list for our adoption, and what that means for the future. I have been hesitant to post anything until we completed our home study renewal, but so we are SO thankful that it is done! Thank you to everyone praying for us; I don’t believe we’d have gotten to this point without God’s help.
On another note, keep your eyes open for another set of photo calendars coming your way soon!
